So Matt, where do I put it?

I particularly liked the "finally" addition by Sharon Bush

The happy hens and token cock

In front of the bay window prior to the Saturday night oysterfest

Charming

"It looks rather like Mike's. Only it's somewhat pinker, and made of plastic, of course"

The Mini-Ming, enjoying some light refreshment

So. The wait is finally over, and as the t-shirt read, Bush & Ming are “finally getting hitched”, and amongst the final acts of singledom was, of course, the hen weekend. As your correspondent was bags-ied by the hen, all the photographs and reports relate to the visit to sunny Whitstable for a weekend of oyster eating for some, and discovery for others. A few tears, a lot of laughter, a number of presents with which batteries were, thoughtfully, included, and more seafood that you could wave a big stick at pretty much sums it up. The photographs for public consumption can be viewed here, and the choicer offerings are included above. As you can hopefully see, a good time was had by all. And, most importantly, Bush loved every minute of it.

Just in case you couldn’t make it, or were not invited, the following awards as voted for by a jury of one pretty much sum the weekend up


Most sloshed hen : Zoe
Best dinner guest : Comrade Ralli
Hen Olympics winner and best swimmer award : Sweens Sweeney
Nice pair award (based on the jostling brought about by exertions in the sack race) : Mrs Weber-McEllison (who won a conference pear to accompany her two blackened eyes)
Best painted toenails : Kirsty Calvert-Ansari
1st photographs up on Facebook : Kirsty Calvert-Ansari
Same top worn all weekend award : Kirsty Calvert-Ansari
Most unlikely hen : Your correspondent
Most indecisive menu hogger : Anita Patti
Best top on Saturday night award : ‘Er indoors (of course)
Best hen presents : Comrade Ralli’s beads
Rudest hen present : Pauline’s vibrating cock ring and vibrator set

Solo Sambuka award : Jo Flood
Silkience girl of the weekend : Sarah Buuuuuuuuuuuuuud
Hen virgin of the weekend : Anita Patti
Matching bra & pants award : Lindsey Bush
Most thoughtful hen (with the dirtiest laugh): Sharon Bush
Redest Bush & best hen : Helen Bush – there was only ever going to be one winner, wasn't there?