Will they call him Gordon?

Muk & Anita prior to conception 9 months ago

Peter’s Friends are delighted to announce that Anita & Muk Ralli-Yahya are the proud parents of a baby son, born at 2.03pm today after an 11 hour labour, weighing 5lbs 10oz. Muk described Anita to Toto in a brief post-birth conversation as a “remarkable woman”, and confided that he collapsed after the birth. Well, fatherhood is hard work, as Susan and Scott can no doubt attest.I spoke to Dave, who wondered whether they “will call him Gordon”? Not a conventional Muslim name, I’ll grant you, but at least he would not be confused with all of the other Isaac/Jimi/Charlie/Matthew Yahya’s (TBA) at playgroup.

Our congratulations to them both, and may the boy have a long and happy life as part of our unique extended family of ex-fenlanders, spouses and partners.

On safari (and in print)

Guess who appears cunningly disguised on page 39 of the latest issue of The Chap depicted as the definitive wearer of the Safari Suit? Modesty forbids, but expanding the above image may offer answers to the above question. And to think I beat Roger Moore – another of a lifetime’s ambition fulfilled.

This is not the exhibition we were looking for

Worth £16.50 of anyone's money. Well, not quite.

Small, isn't she?

As I recently reported on Howards' Way, we visited the Star Wars exhibition on the south bank on Monday, which was distinctly average to say the least. However, my initial coverage neglected to include a picture of Angela with Darth Vader, an oversight I am delighted to rectify here, in addition of one with Susan and R2-D2. May the force be with them, if not the Jedi on this occasion.

Who's the Mother?

Molly, Mummy & the Coven in Ilkley earlier this year

The best of the best?

The worst of the worst?

The McEllison's with their hosts at Howards End yesterday evening

We were delighted to receive a flying visit from the McEllison’s yesterday evening sans sprog, who thoughtfully lent me a CD full of Molly photos for using on the blog. Molly is looking splendid and Jo & Scott were on excellent form, with a display of green bottle demolishing the like of which Howards End had not seen since your corrospondent’s birthday last year. The reason for the visit was because our guests had a wedding in Croyden this morning (Thursday is obviously the new black in Croyden) and as such, we were delighted to offer bed and beer to the weary travellers. And to think – I thought people only went to Croyden to visit Ikea.

A fishy tail in Highlands Village

"You would kick yourself if you didn't do it, wouldn't you Alex" (R.Naomi Goldfinger, 9.00pm Saturday)

If the shoe fits - Sweens steps into Alex's Heelys

Your corrospondent stroking the womb of Comrade Ralli whilst wearing white trousers

Luncheon

Red Bush after having had her eyebrows dyed ginger

The gathered throng upon the lawns of Howards End on Saturday

So, an intimate gathering at Howards End for fifteen of our closest family & friends. Well, those who were free or who could be bothered to don an oxygen mask to make it as far north as N21 anyway.

Just in case you were not able to make it or “missed the cut” on this occasion, you might have missed fun and frivolity such as that documented above, which included a game of Cinderella with Steptoe’s “Heelys”, stroke the Muslim in the womb, who can eat the most garlic bread and stuff the salmon bone in the hosts slippers. And we managed to stay out in the garden until 12.30am. Rock’n’roll, eh?

Many happy returns (to sobriety)

Uncle Fagin in all his pomp

Many happy returns of the day to Uncle Fagin, who is thirty something today. He is celebrating with his family this evening, and is no doubt looking forward to the remote control car his brother Susan has brought him as a surprise present. His parents will be astounding him with a check shirt and a fleece top, and his nephew would be most concerned if it leaked out that he had brought his Uncle a special DVD edition of Oliver! from Spar.

No expense spared and very little incurred – just the way Fagin likes it. Happy birthday Justin.

Wombing marvelous

Guess who?

Ralli, looking splendid on Friday evening

Comrade Ralli entertained the Coven, your correspondent, Liz, Ben, Ming & Steptoe last Friday evening, and a splendid time was had by one and all, with Anita excelling herself in the kitchen for our collective benefit. Just in case you are interested, I am delighted to share with you pictures showing Anita’s “bump-slim”. Not long now Comrade, not long. I had a word with my friend Captain Campion, an expert in the birthing process, who said the delivery might “smart” a bit. Proof, in any were needed, that too much knowledge is a bad thing, as we were taught during our years at Anglia.

"Discretion is the better part of valour". Discuss.

"Your secret's safe with me."

Your correspondent managed to find a gap in his busy drinking schedule to have a swift half with Mrs Jackson yesterday evening, who was customarily indiscreet as usual. Quite why anyone shares a confidence with the woman who would betray the trust for nothing more than a cheap laugh beggars belief, but she told me things yesterday evening that made me wince with embarrassment and laugh like a hyena. Or was it me with the loose tongue? Oh, yes. Sorry.

Recommended reading

Do you like Blur? Do you like reading? Would you like to read all about Blur, and specifically, Alex James? Well, his autobiography is now available at a bookseller near you for the princely sum of £16.99 (or considerably less of you buy it from Amazon).

“Unputdownable” - Matthew Howard