Get DeBeers in! An engagement is announced.

Ben doing the Heimlich Maneuver on his fiancee. Either that, or he gwoping her.

Someone's had a big day out at Elizabeth Duke

Peter’s Friends is delighted to announce that two of Peter’s closest friend’s, Toto and Ben, are engaged to be married. Suffice as to say that your correspondent is delighted for them both, and I don’t think it would be betraying a confidence to say that the nuptials are planned for this summer, at a Metropolitan venue TBA. Our congratulations to them both – I’m sure they will be very happy.

The Thames corridor of uncertainty - Another of an occasional series

Hope he likes the M4

Three guess who’s got a job with Sober? Well, he’s got big ears, his wife’s a monster and his father-in-law’s a scouse git.

Answers on a postcard to C.Caplin when you’ve worked it out from the clues.

Many happy returns of the Jedi

Rohan and his father, Susan Skywalker-Sweeney

Darth Fagin

Angela relaxing on her leather sofa yesterday evening

Many happy returns of the day to Rohan , who is the ripe old age of two today. I’m sure his birthday will be characterised with large smiles and grand-parental endowments (unless they’ve changed the rules from my youth), and probably a drink or two to celebrate this event. That’s what the wife and I are planning, at least. Happy birthday Rohan – it seems only yesterday Susan called to announce that the Jedi had returned to Dwyford.

Red Bush, anyone?

I trust that you have all seen the advertisements for the latest offering from those tea purveyors to the discerning, Tetley. After all of these years, it is so gratifying to see Red Bush entering the mainstream.

If you spend your waking hours consciously avoiding commercial television, the following link will save you the trouble of tuning in on the off-chance. You can’t get the mugs featured in the adverts yet (I have already tried), but rest assured as and when they’re commercially available, you’ll be the next to know.

Birthday beavering

Filth

Many happy returns of the day today to the one and only Bristols Spice, Buuuuud, who although it scarcely seems possible, is 33 years young today.

Let’s hope she fears better than last year, as when asked what she would, Sarah, in her typically oblique fashion, told Dean that she wanted some “rabbit food” due to the robust appetite of her favourite pet. Imagine her disappointment when Dean came home with an 8 pack of Duracell, a bottle Champagne and a look of a man whose boat was about to come in when Buuuuud said “That’s all well and good Dean, and the batteries will be useful for our overburdened silicon-covered friend, but Fluff has not been fed since Christmas”. As they say in the best of families, it’s good to talk.

If you would like to see a video of Wabbit playing with Mr Beaver, the following link should satisfy the most curious. And if you want to see a rude Ann Summers advert….

Father & son

Oh Paul, where do you get all of your energy from? You fair wear me out.

Your correspondent & his delightful assistant have had the pleasure of Shteeeeeve’s company since Saturday, Shteeeeve having business in the Smoke which necessitated early starts and late nights. Although it is always a pleasure to see him (well, most of the time at least, as is customary to say), I detected that his heart was not entirely in his visit on this occasion, for precisely the reasons depicted above. Although most new Father’s are said to be proud, few can have been captured on camera looking quite so glowing as Shteeeeve does on the occasion depicted, and pleasant though hopefully his stay at Howards’ End was, I’m sure he’s glad to be home.

Some wonderful news

Bristols Spice, who looks blooming as you can see.

Can you see what it is yet?

Peter's Friends is delighted to announce that your correspondent was given the splendid news yesterday evening that Buuuuuuuuuuuud is 15 weeks pregnant, news which both she and Dean are pleased to share with the wider world by the medium of cyberspace.

Our congratulations to them both, and we are delighted that a further visit to Beds Direct has been averted, they having broken two bed frames thus far in their quest for fertilisation, according to popular & indiscreet legend (Anita).

Lights! Camera! Filth!

It's always the quiet ones, as you all know....

Our South London film correspondent had a big weekend, for in addition for watching the aforementioned Jane Austen dramatisation, she made it along to watch Ang Lee’s Lust, Caution, which based on the reviews I’ve read is as far removed from Ms Austen’s writings as is physically possible. The film obviously had a profound effect on Bush, who suggested that I might like it, and concluded her review with the phrase “ I'd never seen anything like it!” And I remember when she used to recommend films to me like The Age of Innocence – how times have changed in within the court of the merciless one.

Another made up story about Bush

“You know Mike, when you put on the breeches you look just like Christian….”

I hear from Anita & Toto that Bush has been un-contactable on a Sunday evening of late, she being engrossed in Andrew Davies’s reworking of Sense & Sensibility which finished on Sunday. Bush had read in her paper’s little magazine (which I gather is required reading amongst those lost souls who have failed to become converted to the joys of the Murdoch) that Andrew Davies has a rather raunchy repudiation as a screenplay writer, and following on from Pride & Prejudice, she was rather hoping for some topless action from the male leads over the past 3 weeks. With this not forthcoming, I gather it has fallen upon Ming’s broad shoulders to wander round the flat on a Sunday evening wearing nothing more than a top hat and breeches whilst occasionally hosing himself down with the showerhead for her amusement. As I said to the wife whilst rudely mocking the urban whims of our inner-city chums, long live the indiscretion of female friends.

2 for the price of one

Peter’s Friends is delighted to present for inspection not only Angela Mulholland in a very fetching floral smock, but also Paul James Mulholland on the day he was born. Shteeeeve informs me he has already changed his first nappy, and he will be wetting the baby’s head with your correspondent and his glamorous assistant when he moves in at the weekend for a week’s theatrical residency in the Metropolis.

It's a baby, Rodney

Your correspondent is delighted to announce to all friends of Peter that Angela Mulholland has, after nine months, has not only thoughtfully provided Shteeeeve with a son and heir, but has done so within the boundaries of Cambridge courtesy of the maternity unit at Adenbrookes, which has got to be worth double points.

For those of you who like to know the pertinent facts relating to issue, Paul James Mulholland was born at 2.04am on 9th January 2008, weighing in at 8lbs exactly, and entered this world without recourse to the Anglo-Saxon dialect, gas or air by Mrs Shteeeeve. Shteeeve had a good swear and plenty of gas, mind you, and even managed to cut the cord. Who says men are useless in these situations?

Ever the gentleman, the finer points of the birth were glossed over, but it may amuse readers to recall that last time I was in Adenbrookes, I came out with five stiches. I had been impaled on a fleur-de-lys style capital atop railing outside Trinity Master’s Garden whilst trying to gatecrash our 5th garden party of the day on Suicide Sunday in 1997, and was unsurprisingly fried to the tonsils at the time. I seem to recall suggesting to the staff in casualty that I though I had broken my leg, which a scan proved to be a figment of my drink addled imagination, although they were rather upset that an ambulance had been called for me at the time. Let us all hope Angela has fared better on her visit to Adenbrokes, and may we once again offer our congratulations to Shteeeeeve and Angela on the birth of Paul. Arsenal baby-grows and red and white knitted bobble hats can be sent to the usual address in the rural fenlands of Chez Mulholland.

A blog devoid of both sense & sensibility

Well, I think that she looks like her.

Louise Woodward, Annie, Hattie Morahan, Dervla Kerwin & Emma Chambers at Howards’ End in June last year

Keen devotees of BBC drama will no doubt be looking forward to their Sunday evenings this January, as the latest dramatisation of Sense & Sensibility has been amusing the discerning viewer for the last two Sunday’s. Bearing in mind that Bush & her sisters bear a striking resemblance in character to the Bennett’s of Pride & Predjudice, I was amused to observe the striking resemblance of Hattie Morahan (who is playing Elenor) to Bush’s older sister Sharon. See what you think - a prize of the (arguably superior) Ang Lee version on VHS for every other celebrity look-alike sent to your correspondent before 12th night.

If you wanna be my Mother....

Guess the Mother of this young Mollster. Answers on a postcard to an address from Jo's address book.

Vodka Spice, Primark top Spice, Strawberry Ginger Spice and of course, Bristols Spice in her very pretty wedding dress

Many happy returns of the day to ‘er in Ilkley, Mrs Weber McEllison (Ginger Hug to her friends of yore), here pictured at the most recent reuniting of the Spice Girls at Buuuuud & Dean’s nuptial celebrations. According to her “out of office reply”, Jo will not be returning to work until Monday. Well, it is her birthday week, after all. Happy birthday Jo.

Whole lotta your corrospondent

I had to be moved once because my shirt was causing "strobing"

On the far left if you're short sighted

Just in case you missed the Top of the Pops Christmas special on Christmas day, you will have missed Liz being the first person in the audience panned onto when the the first act the Kaiser Chiefs were on. I’m afraid I don’t have any stills of this fleeting appearance (one of a number I might add), but courtesy of a friend of my sister-in-law, a number of stills of Katie Melula’s rendition of “Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas” featuring your correspondent quite prominently managed to find their way to me by email, which I thought I might like to share with the wider world. As my brother said in a text message, “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas….and stop staring at Katie Melua’s arse”. Sometimes, the evidence for the prosecution can be somewhat overwhelming, but luckily enough, the song has not yet made it on to YouTube, hence my over-animated clapping will not reach a wider audience yet, but even I winced when I saw my shameful performance. Hope you managed to catch it - or not as the case may have it.

Happy New Year

A very happy New Year to all of Peter’s Friends. Peter’s Friends will be back as and when the self-assessment deadline allows. I bet you can't wait.