The Darling Buds of May Week

How to kill two birds with one stone - your correspondent with Ma Larkin and Luscious Liz

Bush & Christian with their old housefrau Kath, as captured by Tim

For years, the one thing Bush would not forgive me for (well, one of many) is the day I went shopping with her and Alex, resulting in her coming home looking like Ma Larkin and Alex like Julian Sands. Well, I accept no responsibility for the appearance of either of them – they were both adults, and were not under sartorial duress from your correspondent. Well, no more than I ever seek to exercise, given a voice. In fact, I always thought that Bush looked splendid in the dress, but there you go. Anyway, in order that you may make an informed judgment, may I present Bush and Ma Larkin together for the first time, Bush being featured along side your correspondent and the lady I am proud to call my wife after the Union garden party in June 1994, a gloriously sunny day in which a large quantity of nail varnish remover masquerading as peach schnapps was consumed. There was very little food served that day, I seem to recall, but Bush made sure she did not miss out on a good feed, and was observed by Christian disappearing into the bathroom later that evening with a platter groaning under the weight of the sausages, bacon & eggs contained thereon……...